There is no sugar coating it, this year has been a disaster, and we will feel the effects for years to come.
Not many people know this, but at the end of last year and the beginning of this year, I saw a therapist. Not because I had any specific issue or reason to, but as an instructor and a relatively new father to two children, I didn't want to pass my baggage onto my kids and on to my students. The idea of seeing a therapist felt like it would be a short affair, I imagined that I would go in there and the therapist would quickly see that I was fine and didn’t need to spend money on a therapist.
How wrong I was!
My therapist was excellent. We spent three months doing weekly sessions. She was able to help me see that the view from the window I was looking out of was beautiful, I just needed to shift focus and stop looking at my own reflection in the glass. This stood me in good stead to face 2020.
In January, I took some of my senior students on a trip to Singapore. Singapore is my favourite place in the world to visit, and it happens to be the home of our Tiger Crane Combination and Shuang Yang system. Apart from the two days of food poisoning that I suffered, we all had a wonderful time, eating our way through the food courts.
We visited a Feng Shui shop to get hold of some amulets for the new year on this trip. The Feng Shui Master explained that this coming year is the year of the metal rat, and it will not be a fun year. He explained that this year will be a year of disease, economic collapse and that there will be a significant hit to the travel industry. As a sceptic by nature, I am still trying to logically understand how his prediction was so accurate.
Covid-19 hit us in March and lockdown after lockdown started. In this time, my Kung Fu School, like most others, has suffered a lot. We have had to teach a lot of the year on zoom, this was a difficult transition to make, and we have not been allowed to spar or practise partner drills at all since March. On the business side, we have lost around 30% of our students, and have had to adapt to last-minute rules from the government on lockdowns and restarts.
On a personal note, 2020 has been a year of refinement and learning. My own Kung Fu level has taken a massive leap forward, and I have reworked and adapted the way I teach. I have already seen the improvements my students are making and continue to make with these new methods.
Here is what I have learnt this year.
Many businesses have been forced to close for good, and many more are on the brink. Our school has been able to continue and is looking good moving forwards. Many people tell me that this is due to my hard work and my ability to keep my students motivated to train. I politely thank them but know this is not the real reason. The reason is very simple, as much as we like to think we are the masters of our own fate, no person is truly an island. I have been able to continue teaching and running Kung Fu Zone because my students refuse to let me stop. Through zoom training, to training in the rain outdoors, to covid secure training in halls, back to zoom training. My students have been there with me, learning and keeping me motivated to teach them. I even have students who have trained in maybe 3 or 4 classes all year, who refuse to cancel their memberships.
I have always considered my role as a teacher and guide as a lonely role. My students have taught me this year that it doesn’t have to be lonely and that when the waves are violent, and the ship is in danger, they will all lend a hand to keep us steady. I love them all and will always be grateful to them.
I don’t know what 2021 will hold, nobody does. I just know that if we are resilient, we will get through it, and if we are together, we will thrive.
As a father to a young son, I will do one thing in 2021 that I wasn’t so good at before, I will tell my male friends I love them more. If you feel it, and it will bring joy to another person, why hold it back?
My family and I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
Head Instructor - Shkar Sharif
Why do I train in the Martial Arts? - I genuinely believe that we should always strive to become better than we were yesterday. We should disassemble our minds, our identities and truly understand what it is that we fear, what it is that holds us back. What baggage are we carrying that stops us from climbing higher and higher. In my opinion, nothing does this as well as Martial Arts training.
This critical self-analysis cannot be done while in a state of comfort. If your mind and your body are not at the extremes of what you can tolerate you can not honestly see your ego for what it is, a mechanism for keeping you where you are. If you don’t force your body to continue doing those burpees when your mind is screaming “enough!” You won’t understand how much your mind lies to you. If you are not doing your 25th first form in a row, you won’t realise how much you can truly tolerate.
To truly understand who you are and why you are this way, you need to put yourself through the fire. Because it is this fire, that burns away the lies and the illusions and leaves you with the truth. Your demons have nowhere to hide when you place yourself way outside your comfort zone; and when you can see your demons, you can begin slaying them!
This is personal growth; this is refinement, this is how we reach enlightenment! I have spent 2018 putting myself outside of my comfort zone on a daily basis and have grown as a result of doing this. I have also spent 2018 putting my students outside of their comfort zones, and they have become better as a result.
In 2019 I will not relent, I will keep climbing and refining my mind and body and will take my students along this journey with me. However, I have just one requirement from them,
“Leave your excuses in 2018.”
Nobody is born proficient at any skill. We may have a genetic disposition to be better at certain things than other people, but without developing and nurturing these skills, a person’s full potential will never be realised. Any athlete, musician, dancer, performer, etc. will tell you that improving any skill takes time, energy and perseverance. Becoming good at anything is painful and requires making sacrifices.
I started my training in Tiger Crane Combination Kung Fu over 16 years ago. At first, it was just something to do a few times a week, but I very quickly began training in every class my instructor held. I was training two to three hours a day six to seven days a week. I was 16 years old when I started training, and it was all I did. When my friends would go out, I was training. When my family would get together, I was training; I often even missed school and university events because I was training. I found very quickly that I no longer had the friends that I used to have. It was not their fault, they did try to keep me as part of the group, but I never had the time because I was always training.
I didn’t always enjoy my training; there were times when I wanted just to relax or I wanted to go out with my friends. There were times when I felt I wasn’t improving and didn’t see a way forward. I had no motivation to train. That’s what this blog post is about, motivation.
As humans, we tend towards comfort and ease, and we try to get far away from anything that takes us away from our comfort zones. It is a common occurrence for my students to talk to me about motivation. Some tell me they are not attending as many classes as before because they lack the motivation to train or that they are currently very motivated to train and that is why they are in most of my classes. It is critical to understand that having the motivation or not having the motivation to do something are both as tricky as each other and if we base our training on this fleeting feeling that may or may not be with us on any given day, we will never reach the heights that are possible.
We need to train ourselves to stop looking for something to motivate us to train or to do our work. We need to develop the discipline to do what needs to get done regardless of motivation. When we have the discipline and the ability to force ourselves to train when we don’t want to, this is what will lead us to mastery.